First of all, merry Christmas and happy holidays!
I have to say, I'm not as sad as it seems, hopefully. Maybe I have a problem, I don't know. I tend to overthink a lot, that's what both my boyfriend and my mom tells me all the time.
But anyways. My semester "was" great, until I bombed all my finals. And now, I'm just lost. I don't get how I could get 80 the whole semester, and just... flunk like that.
It hurts, I don't know what I'm doing wrong, what I have to consider, who I can talk to about this. Looking at myself is really difficult, I can't think of... anything, when I'm like this. I often want to cry. Failing isn't something that makes anyone feel good, and... I seem to be doing that at a moment's notice.
What should I consider in my life, and how can I... move from this? Nothing ever seems to be going the way I want it to be, and I want a job later on, so I can live comfortably. And not a minimum wage job, I even want to quit my current job, because all the people there are really toxic. Being around them is like being around a bunch of pigs.
I've gotten a new computer, and my friend helped me build it. But now, I just feel like poop. I can play games all I want, but... it won't help me build a career. People have told me if I played less games, my grades would go up, and yes, very true. But you have to consider that I got a solid grade of 80 throughout the semester, and I STILL BOMBED THE FINALS.
I've sent an application to switch programs, before my school decides to cut me. Hopefully it works. But... I don't know guys. I don't know what I need right now, or who I can talk to. My boyfriend is a great listener, but his advice is a bit lacking, and my family... I can't trust them anymore. My friends have a nonchalant attitude about everything, with the exception of my best friends, they've helped me throughout my life, all the time.
I have work soon, hopefully I won't feel too down.
Alice Lieberg
